Essentially the CIA and how my brain operates (mental health)

Schizophrenia how it works in my brain wondering what you guys think (and the 4 life choices I have in front of me that make some sense, or maybe they do not, let me go through them.)

I think either Schizophrenia is a disorder that is caused mainly by drugs like Cocaine and Meth, or if you took to much Adderall and abused it, etc. But I don’t feel like I hear voices anymore. I feel like the only voice I hear is my own. I once thought that the Schizophrenia in my ear would be someone in the CIA, I had some delusional beliefs that I discovered I had to learn from.

I am wondering about all the options I had in my life I will discuss in detail:

The Military #1

School (game design or paralegal) #2 (I prefer game design, it is more friendly)

Entertainer (singer or even standup comedian) (would have to perform and travel with a manager who believes in me, probably no record label, and struggle like hell) #3

Just work at a restaurant the rest of my life and wait for my inheritance. (the easy way, lol) #4

I would not be ready for the military because for starters not a big fan of guns, even though I love some odd hip hop artists who sing about it. I also do not like weed and I love weed songs at times. But I also realize that mental health is becoming more evident in the military, people get PTSD like my stepbrother Wesley has his PTSD, from his time there.

So, the game design works best for me, I did like paralegals, but it would depend if I could express myself on the internet still. You could technically be a great paralegal and have a website that does interviews with people in jails and with correctional guards with permission and help criminals (some of them) get early released and get involved in the CIA even if you meet lawyers who employ you, who have connections. Or is that a delusion? But I would like to think the CIA works everywhere, usually people who work for the CIA work at companies, and sometimes restaurants, its just about reporting what you go through or for some undercovers to catch corrupt cops or drug dealers in general. But one day they can all be forgiven; it is a difficult topic. People get involved in crime for different reasons. I like video games plain and simple, and as long as I can respect all of my co-worker’s opinions then one day maybe I will get recruited.

As for entertainers, I feel like blogging is more fun than making music even though I still love to do that. I feel like expressing yourself in music should be liberal, and it is okay if not everyone likes your music, they can agree to disagree etc. So yeah, I would love to perform if I could memorize a song if these antipsychotics wouldn’t cause so much memory loss. I mean people perform on weed sometimes like Drake and Lil Wayne or maybe they lip sync a little and pause and play the audio of their voice in the background and go back into the song. I have memorized a lot of their music.

I think Drake has one of the hardest jobs of all because he just has to agree with so many things’ people say, because he is like a CIA recruit, it’s possible, I could be wrong, just a theory not a delusion. I would imagine if I was touring and all that the CIA would recruit me for something, that can range from serious criminals who commit heinous crimes, or it can simply be money laundering or church scams or invest in our product. When I see these companies on Shark Tank asking for investments in their product I feel bad for like 90% of them, because 80% or more of them do not ever profit, and they could struggle with mental disorders themselves and they could be looking to scam the Sharks out of their money, and maybe even the Sharks like Mark Cuban and the others have to investigate companies with the FBI.

Even Howard Sterns radio program was bugged by the FBI to trace calls when Serial Killers or pretend Serial killers would call in to the program. So, it depends on the severity of the crime, and what they plan to do. So, in reality because of police work which I respect at times I guess, it would be hard for me to perform. I have dirty jokes that are stand up which are hilarious, but the jokes could land me in small trouble, nothing to bad, maybe even pick up a girl here and there which is a risk because they could have boyfriends, unless they are into that open sort of thing.

Some people reading this work currently would even say either jokingly or maybe in all seriousness, that I should not leak this sort of information. But this is all common information, I would like to be an entertainer when I am much older or maybe if I have been a game designer for 10 years at least, maybe the best friends I make would be my coworkers at the game design companies I work at. So, assume this website to be like my resume to see if they like me, and I have to learn from both sides of the coin because if I just pick one then maybe they could overlook me. I want a cool boss who will let my content slide because they understand we like to have fun and talk smack at home. But as long as it’s not at work.

The last thing is work at a restaurant till I get my inheritance. That is under the assumption if I wanted to take molly and pay my bills with money from my boss and hopefully never get drug tested, assuming I wanted to be a functioning drug addict. I will forgive my brother Wesley for sometimes being a coke head with his ex-girlfriend, won’t say her name, because he probably snorted etc. But nobody knows Wesley anyways, he is clean now, he just takes his psych meds and smokes weed, but I think he deserves another chance. He likes to go by Phantom when we play Halo. Hopefully he won’t get mad at my comments lol. One of the first things his ex said to me was I love Cocaine. She was so high that I thought I had to do it with them. The funny thing is he has never been drug tested and has worked at our father’s company with no problems, but he does a great job at his job he never gets yelled at. Jagex probably would never tolerate drug use.

I just hope I learn how to be respectful of everyone’s opinions because, one person may actually like me a lot and another one may hate me a lot, but hopefully they understand how opinions work. In my opinion I think people should forgive each other and work together no matter what, like I could work with just about anybody. But if someone is far to conservative and they were my co-worker and said “I do not like this individual Augusto, he is to opiniated on the internet, and he bothers me etc.” I would want a boss that picks my side and says something in return like “You need to learn to work with people who are different, it is okay if you agree to disagree, he is just an entertainer with a job at our company, please be respectful.” And even get them in trouble as well if they were being far to conservative.

I realize I am stubborn and maybe some people hate that I have seen escorts before on ads etc. So many scams by the way, but honestly that is not even the problem, I am bad at talking to women, I got decent game, maybe I could, but I would need one who tolerates me as a person. One day I will find the right woman, it may take time, who knows maybe pretty woman and I realize it’s the escort who is the one I marry, that I have no idea.

Do I belong in jail with people who sell fentanyl which kills people, or serial killers or pedophiles who have acted on their thoughts on children, etc.

Maybe sex should be legalized for money, as long as both parties are satisfied. To many bitter conservatives have taken over our government but hopefully the opinions will change over time. Notice how weed became legal over time, even though I hate it, and I had an incident where I attacked someone close to me while I was high which made me quit. But paying someone for sex is not for everyone, and in some cases the escort could be delusional and instead of 500 or700 an hour they want 1,000 or more, so this can be dangerous. We need more studies on this topic.

Lastly, I think not only are people who are overly conservative wrong in many respects, should I go settle down with the first girl I meet at a dog park? Or on a dating app? What if I can’t accept all the political views coming out of her mouth, or maybe she thinks my content is offensive or maybe she doesn’t exercise as much as me, but actually I could marry a bigger girl, it doesn’t matter much, in the past I don’t know if I could, but I do prefer either a little thick like myself or even thin, even the unhealthy looking thin version I am a sick sick man. Lol

I feel like bringing smiles on peoples faces and letting you guys get to know me, will cause some diversity but it is worth the unification and the entertainment value you get, and maybe those of you in government and the CIA who side with me, will see the world change, one step at a time.

And I promise eventually I will go to dog parks its okay if I get rejected, I may not try so hard, but I am off these Benzinos man they got me twisted. School girls are the best (adult ones) hah gotchya, you almost fell for that.

And FYI I don’t mind if a person a stranger I talk to knows me secretly, and doesn’t tell me if they see me, one or two have recognized me in public, it would just be weird, its okay to be a silent fan.

Stealthy Abyss Under cover cop song (I’m getting high so I could last at the murder show) lmao Federales around the corner, heard it in one of the trappin in paradise mixes.

Trappin in paradise 65

Cole 1 hour chill songs (volume 2)